Monday, May 01, 2006

thanks grandma

My grandma has a way of making me feel like a rejected 7th grader whenever I talk to her. I called my grandparents yesterday to wish my grandfather a happy 75th (apparently I have young g-parents). After speaking with Opa about their recent trip to Nashville, he put Oma on the phone. As usual, the first thing out of her mouth was, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

Most of my friends have heard the stories about Oma and how she picks on me for not being attached. She was married by age 21. And then she had a son soon after. She also fled Germany with her future husband following WW2. These were different times, I remind her. I only graduated college at 22. And I'm only 24. I've been at my job less than two years. The last thing on my mind is starting a family. There is no way I am ready for that.

It's hard for her to understand, I think, just as it is hard for me to imagine what her life was like when she arrived in Canada barely speaking English. It's also hard for her to understand seeing as some of her friends have great-grandchildren. And she wants some too. But would she rather have a granddaughter who finished college, is currently enrolled in an MBA program while also working in her desired field OR a granddaughter who maybe didn't do all that but has a child already?

Children aside, Oma wants me to have a boyfriend. She told me last night that she could not have lived without a man at age 20. I thought of a variety of ways to respond to this, but said nothing. I am nothing like my grandmother. I don't ever want to feel like I cannot live without a man. Living without the person I love is one thing; not having a man around is quite another. I get by very well, thank you.

And even though she says she's just kidding around, her words always get to me. No matter how many times I have this conversation with her, I leave feeling like there's something wrong with me. On top of all this, the Nice Guy has totally pulled the Stop Calling And She'll Get the Hint trick and, well, stopped calling. Huh.

In spite of all this, I'll give you my list of 5 for today:

1. I make people earn my trust.
2. I approach problems with enthusiasm.
3. I try to make the most out of every day.
4. I'm punctual.
5. I have a beautiful smile.

1 comment:

Sub Girl said...

my mom makes me feel the same way. everything can be going just dandy, and a call from my mom will just plunge me into self-doubt. we just have to ignore the negativity...we're too young to be married.