just frustrated, that's all

I haven't seen in A in over two weeks. This is when I start to doubt everything. This is when I get a little freaked out. And this is why I get scared when I start to really like someone. Because, inevitably, there will be these feelings of doubt. The feelings that tell me he's no longer interested. That he no longer wants to hang out with me in his bed all day on Sunday. That those wishes to treat me to a lovely dinner were nothing more than empty promises.

I don't really believe this. I don't think he isn't interested. I think we are both insanely busy. I think we are both very loyal to our friends and understand that they often come first. And because we haven't had the whole boyfriend/girlfriend discussion yet, there is no reason to get all bent out of shape. But it doesn't change the fact that I really want to see him. That it has been far too long and I am getting anxious. Especially after Friday night, a night where for 7 hours we sent each other text messages trying to meet up and both of us ending up at home, alone.

So I want to see him. I want to just hang out, the two of us. And it shouldn't have to be this massive effort. Unfortunately, due to our schedules, it often is.