Monday, April 03, 2006

Entering Phase Two

In just a few weeks, the crush has turned sour. In my opinion, this happened when I got really drunk at Happy Hour two Fridays ago and was probably being obnoxious. I don't really recall much about the latter half of the evening, but usually if I have a bad feeling about my behavior, I'm probably right to feel that way. And it's not being drunk that might have totally ruined things, it's what I might have said or done around him. He was barely in the office last week so there were few opportunities to observe our interactions. Today, however, I had to talk to him about something and I could just feel something strange in our conversation. Now I just feel stupid. It's not so much the Crush that's bothering me, as the fact that I made an ass of myself.

And you'd think this all wouldn't matter since I should be distracted by the Nice Guy I've gone out with a few times. The Nice Guy who seems really interested and isn't afraid to say so. The Nice Guy who is also pretty good-looking, especially when compared to the goofiness of the Crush. The Nice Guy who was out of town this weekend, but called me right when he returned. The Nice Guy who definitely has some potential. However, the Nice Guy still can't keep me distracted enough to forget the Crush.

It's no surprise. I always want what I can't have and take for granted the things that are right in front of me.

3 comments:

Sub Girl said...

what's so awesome about the Crush? do you feel more of a connection with him?

Ripe for Reading said...

I think that what's meant to be will be--as cliche as it sounds. I say give Nice Guy a good solid chance and let whatever happens happen. Have fun and don't stress! And don't worry about your drunk behavior with the Crush. Maybe it's you who is making HIM nervous!

Sizzle said...

giiiirl, i am so like that too. it's the nature of the beast i tell ya.

sometimes i think i have made an ass out of myself but really it is just my internal crap that is projecting that feeling and in reality, they don't think that at all.

nice guy sounds really nice!